via chud.

I don’t get why anyone would want Sam Raimi back on the Spider-Man franchise. I don’t understand why Raimi would want back on, his last three films were spider man movies. It’s time to do something different.

Three movies is the absolute maximum anyone should spend on one of these franchises. Raimi had an alright run, he hit his spider-man apex with number two and now it’s time for some new talent. The cast especially needs to be swapped out. There’s so many great up and coming young actors these days, all of whom are way better than Tobey McGuire (note to self: call him Dopey McGuire, that will be funny).

Here’s my choices for who should take over the franchise:

Director - Gore Verbinski, I think Verbinski is the most consistently talented blockbuster type director working right now (except for Spielberg). He’s versatile; good with actors as well as elaborate effects sequences, and visually his films look great. Most of all he’s always trying new things and he doesn’t repeat himself, exactly what’s called for to rejuvenate this franchise.
He’s the director people want Bryan Singer to be.

other choices: The aforementioned Spielberg, but that’s kind of a no brainer. I never used to think David Fincher was a good fit for Spider-Man but I’ve recently come around to him. He’d give us a really cool, really different take on the character.

Spider-Man - Y’all know how I love the JGL (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) and he’d be great in this role, he’d be the Dopey McGuire antidote. There’s a million other great choices though: Ben Foster, Emile Hirsch, Casey Affleck is on the other side of thirty but I could still see it. But all these guys have great careers right now, I could see them being reluctant to get involved with a big sign-your-life-away project like this. Get The Invisibles Kid, he’d be good.

Gwen Stacy - First of all, we’ve seen MJ, there’s nothing new to learn about her, she’s done. Gwen Stacy will be a much needed change of pace, and she’s already been played by Bryce Dallas-Howard who is a great up-and-comer. Another young actress I like, Sienna Miller but fuck it, it doesn’t mattr who plays this throwaway romantic interest role so cast whoever.
One thing I am adamant about; Gwen Stacy should have a cool 1970’s era retro style going because that’s the way everyone remembers her from the comix. Cast whoeverthefuck but get the wardrobe right.

Aunt May - Oh that’s right, no one gives a fuck. Bitch is dead in my movie. Or if being dead is unavailable, Jar Jar Binks.

Uncle Ben - Everyone’s known for years that Uncle Ben looks just like Morgan Freeman. Remember, Peter’s adopted.

And of course Christopher Walken as the Villain. Or he’d be good as Jameson. Also good as Jameson - Terry O’Quin from Lost or James Hogan from Battlestar Galactica.

No wait, Josh Brolin as the villain, Kraven the Hunter. I blew my own mind with that.

But the main issue I’d like to address is the out of control scope of these Spider-Man movies and by extension all Hollywood franchises. Spider-Man is a subject screaming out for a tight, fast moving 90 minute treatment.
Furthermore there are two lessons that we should learn from action films this year. First of all, Transformers proved that there is no reason why any movie should cost more than $150 million. Throwing money at these productions is what makes them run amok and from now on Summer movies need to be disciplined and under control.
Secondly, Death Proof taught us that conventional stunts are still the best special effects out there. We’re all jaded from seeing CGI stunt people and nothing kicks us in the groin like seeing real people almost dying.

So that concludes my vision for the Spider-Man franchise.

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